Looking down on some eyesores

It’s been a dull few weeks on the Sussex Express letters page lately. Horse manure? Daft yokel names for rather ordinary pubs? Deservedly obscure Sussex McGonagall poets? Dearie me - it must be the silly season. Anyway, back by great popular demand (from the non-Liberal voting parts of Ringmer at least) in an attempt to inject some life into this once great local newspaper I offer you this piece of upbeat enlightenment - in considerably less than 400 words, natch.

Taking advantage of the glorious weather, last weekend we took our usual route over Mill Plain - you know the one - to quote the recently deposed Planning Gauleiter & Professor Emeritus (retired) Peter Gardiner - “a footpath that hardly anyone ever uses” - to walk over the Downs from Ringmer to Glynde so as to enjoy the wondrous Oompah Afternoon at the Trevor Arms. A grand day out and so typically Sussex and barking - well, it was for charity, mate. On the way, I fell to musing on the hideous excrescence that is the “new” Glyndebourne Opera Carbuncle. How on earth did they get planning permission for that? (I think we all know, don’t we?)

Hauling over the hill into Glynde, we witnessed the other local eyesore that is Balcombe Pit, the soon to be redundant chalk and lime quarry beyond the railway line. I wondered, if this piece of valuable property is still being leased out by Glynde Estate, how long it might be before they decide to flog it off for land raise? Be nice to see this big, ugly gaping hole filled up and finally grassed over. Maybe they could generate some methane from the waste gases produced and save Chris Gustie from having to generate so much natural gas of his own? Who knows, if they were to pile the household waste high enough they might be able to plant another pointless wind turbine on top of it?

Just a thought; all sounds wondrously green to me. But what do the LibDems think - other than what Glyndebourne Productions Ltd tell them to?

Light and peace though in a spirit of pilled & inebriated mischief,

Clive Hobden,

Ringmer