Domestic violence refuge from Worthing Women’s Aid

IT’S a service women hope they will never need to call on, but, if they need it, Worthing Women’s Aid provides refuge, advice and support that can be life-saving and life-changing.

IT’S a service women hope they will never need to call on, but, if they need it, Worthing Women’s Aid provides refuge, advice and support that can be life-saving and life-changing.

The charity provides a host of services for women and children who are experiencing, or have experienced, any form of domestic abuse.

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Domestic violence figures are startling – three women per week nationally are killed by their abusive partners, and many more live with the daily consequences of domestic abuse.

Worthing Women’s Aid was founded by Kathleen Hill in the 1970s.

She was a volunteer with Brighton Refuge and realised there was a need for a refuge in Worthing.

After advertising for more volunteers, a group of people set about trying to convince Worthing Borough Council there was a need for the vital service.

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“There was a lot of opposition to start with, until the government announced that ‘battered wives’ should be considered as homeless and should be re-housed,” said Joyce Jenkin, who works at the women’s refuge in Worthing.

A house was offered to Kathleen and volunteer Barbara Cullen, and the two women made the house into a refuge. It was opened for victims of domestic abuse in 1977.

Over the years, the service has had to change and adapt according to requirements for funding, and to be able to cope with the growing demand of victims of domestic abuse.

The services offered are two-fold – the refuge provides shelter for women fleeing domestic violence from elsewhere in the country, and advice and counselling for women from the Worthing and Arun area who are living with an abusive partner and haven’t decided to, or been able to, leave.

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The refuge, the location of which cannot be disclosed, provides accommodation for five women and their children and is always full.

Joyce said: “We have five bedrooms, two bathrooms and a shower, a kitchen and a dining room and lounge. It can literally be a hot-house of crisis, with women who have been through such terrible ordeals having to come to terms with fleeing from half-way across the country and then living with complete strangers.”

Three years ago, Worthing Women’s Aid became the first service of its kind in Sussex and Surrey to begin something called the Freedom Programme – a 12-week course for any woman who wishes to learn more about the reality of domestic violence and abuse.

Joyce said: “It has been incredibly successful and the numbers have grown significantly from about 10 at the beginning, to more than 800 women we have seen since.

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“The free programme is about helping women understand the beliefs held by abusive men, to illustrate the effects of domestic violence on children, to help recognise potential abusers and to ultimately help women gain self esteem and the confidence to improve the quality of their lives.”

The programme was devised by Pat Craven, who was employed by the probation service and worked for 10 years with violent and abusive men serving sentences in prison.

Pat Craven’s book, Living With the Dominator, includes illustrations and descriptions of some of the different categories of abusive partner.

It includes:

The Headworker, who:

— Puts you down.

— Tells you’re too fat, too thin, ugly, stupid, etc,.

The Liar, who:

— Denies any abuse.

— Says it was “only” a slap.

— Blames drink, drugs, stress, over-work, you, unemployment, etc,.

The Jailer, who:

— Stops you from working and seeing friends.

— Tells you what to wear.

— Keeps you in the house.

— Seduces your friends/family.

Worthing Women’s Aid can be contacted on 01903 219994. For information about the Freedom Programme, call 01903 231939.