Funeral of Nathan, 19

LIFE is sometimes a "mess" and cannot be explained. But it becomes clearer when one stands back and sees the broader picture, sobbing mourners have been told.

Young people made up the bulk of the congregation for the funeral last Friday of 19-year-old apprentice electrician Nathan Darker.

Nathan, whose body was found hanged in Gillham Wood, had left specific requests about his own funeral including his choice of music and the photographs he wanted exhibited.

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The Vicar, the Rev Robert Coates, told more than 120 grieving family and friends: "Life sometimes can be a hell of a mess. We can feel it is beyond our control. We can feel hopeless and alone.

"There are no words I can say to make you feel better about this sad event."

In the service they were handing Nathan back to his Creator.

He said it would be wrong of him to say there were easy answers but he offered them an analogy.

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As an art-lover, when he had studied some John Constable sketches in a gallery they were a jumble, a muddle.

But the picture John Constable had eventually produced, The Hay Wain, was world-renowned.

When he had returned to the gallery and looked again at another Constable, by standing back and taking in the whole picture he could appreciate how Constable had conveyed Salisbury Cathedral by moonlight.

"Perhaps at this time next year we can look back and see things in a clearer light..."

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In a few weeks they would be celebrating the birth of someone who did not die quietly but died an agonising death on the cross as a young man of 33.

He was a young man who was loved and adored yet he died suddenly and unexpectedly.

"This is the core of the Christmas message. Forget all the other stuff, it doesn't matter."

What did matter was that God would take Nathan to him and would help those who mourned his loss. The service included touching family eulogies. Nathan's music choices ranged from When You Wish Upon A Star and Time To Say Goodbye.

In a symbolic gesture timed to coincide with Nathan cremation service that afternoon, friends released 100 gas-filled balloons from the Polegrove, bearing their personal messages in memory of Nathan.