Telscombe

Meetings are open to members of the public who are able to ask questions for a 15 minute period at the start of each meeting. Meetings are held in Telscombe Civic Centre, unless otherwise stated.

ANNUAL COUNCIL MEETING: On Wednesday at 7.30pm in the Civic Centre. Elect Mayor and Deputy Mayor.

YOGA: With Natalie Heath every Tuesday from 6pm to 7pm in the Civic Centre. Contact Natalie Heath email: [email protected] phone: 07738538094.

LIVING LIGHT PILATES: On Monday, Wednesday and Friday at the Civic Centre. £6.50 per class or class pass for £44 (eight classes plus one free session). Contact Nicola Murray-Smith email: [email protected] phone: 07776 457752.

FITNESS PILATES: Every Monday from 9.30am to 10.30am and Thursday 7.30pm to 8.30pm in the Civic Centre. Get fit, tone up, prevent back pain, improve flexibility and posture. Equipment provided, just bring some water. Only £6 per class or £40 for eight weeks. Contact Jennie Palmer email: [email protected] phone: 07825 702775

FLOWER CLUB: Peacehaven and Telscombe Flower Club meet on the third Wednesday of each month, 2pm for 2.30pm start, in the Civic Centre. Floral demonstrations. Chairman: 01273 586191 Treasurer: 01273 581341.

FOOTNOTES: I gazed somewhat cynically at the expensive glossy brochure that spilled its contents across my desk. It was an invitation to look over a nearby retirement complex, (the words home and flat were carefully avoided). I had a feeling the cost of living there would be equal to the beautiful photographs it was littered with. Normally stuff like this ends up in my bin, but as I have got older, I have found myself targeted by similar companies. My computer inbox is inundated with offers of extremely personal hygiene products, which, mercifully, I have not yet had to use. However, the village mentioned was a particular favourite of mine and curiosity got the better of me, although I have never considered leaving my little cottage with its face to the sea and its back to the downs. Accordingly, leaving the estate in the paws of Chaplin, I sallied forth to an appointment. I was received gracefully and ushered into a large room, tastefully decorated and resembling an up market hotel. I toured the remainder of the building, including the apartment which would be available for me. Except, it was not for me. Too small and I would have been terrified of marking or knocking the immaculate, glossy white paintwork that was everywhere. In a side room, a group of elderly people were watching an enormous TV screen, with the sound turned off. I remarked that they all looked rather miserable, and was rewarded with a sniff. I studied the residents around me. There were so many double breasted blazers, and expertly coiffured, blue rinsed hair, that I felt I was at a UKIP convention. The final straw was when I asked whether Chaplin, my cat could come with me. This request was treated as though I had suggested shacking up with a plague sufferer. Absolutely no pets, was the outraged answer. I took my leave of this glossy palace, and returned home to tea and biscuits with Chaplin. The furniture may be past its sell by date, the carpets a trifle worn and the whole place could do with a lick of pain, but it is home. ‘Must have been insane to have even considered it’, I remarked to Chaplin. He purred in agreement. Go safely and have a good week.