PIGLETS: Q. Where is the most inconvenient place for a pig to have piglets? A. In the middle of a field. This is what one of my pygmy rare breed pygmy sows did at 8am on Saturday morning, despite having a perfectly good pig house only six feet away. We had been cutting down elderberry trees and she had made a nest of the cuttings. The six piglets are fit and well. Never a dull moment.

LANGUAGE: I love the English language and it distresses me the way it is deteriorating. Whatever happened to poor little ‘t’? It is excruciating to hear compu’er for computer, par’y for party, wa’er for water. Need I go on? It is also much harder to say without the ‘t’. My other cause is to get rid of the incorrect use of like. Why don’t teachers and parents stop children using it almost every other word in a sentence. Typically heard yesterday ‘I was like late for like school and I thought like I would be in like trouble’. Many Pop performers are to blame.

STUBBLE: I am not referring to straw. When will men go back to being either clean-shaven or bearded and not this scruffy in between? To whom does it appeal? Once more the entertainment world must take some of the blame.

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