Durrington Theatrical Society return to the boards

Written by John Mee and directed by Carol Clark, it will be at the Barn Theatre, Field Place, The Boulevard, Worthing.

The dates are May 25-27 at 7.30pm with tickets are £14 available online at www.ticketsource.co.uk/dts.

Spokeswoman Pam Stringer said: “Welcome to a typical day at the Lloyd George Junior and Infants School.

“There has been an inspection and the report is not good which is not unusual for this poor-performing school.

“The scheming head teacher is only concerned with sucking up to wealthy prospective parents who, he hopes, will donate money to the school and indeed to anyone who will enhance his CV.

“The all-female staff try their best. B ut they are either too lazy, too inexperienced, too naïve or too demoralised to do any good.

“A handsome new supply teacher walks in and suddenly everyone falls over themselves to win his attention.

“What could possibly happen in a school staff room other than meetings, marking and making coffee?

“Please note that this production contains adult humour, swearing and innuendo.

" You have been warned!”

Pam added: “We are an amateur theatre company based at The Barn Theatre, Field Place, Worthing.

“With around 60 members, young and old and we strive to produce three great shows throughout the year.”