Mrs Downs' Diary December 29 2005

On Saturday night we attended a surprise 25th wedding anniversary party. Our friend's children had proved themselves devious, manipulative and capable liars in order to divert their parents' attention away from the fact that they planned to erect a marquee in the garden and invite over a 100 guests to celebrate.

After sending their parents off on a treasure hunt, one of whose clues centred on our farm, they were then sent to a spa for several hours and to another friend's house for pre-dinner drinks. Then they were whisked away, blindfolded and ear muffed for a tortuous trip home.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, we had to keep very quiet while they were led in and unwrapped. The noise of barking dogs filtered through to them: "We must be home," Helen said, "I can hear the dogs."

"We forgot about them," their daughter whispered.

As the blindfolds were whisked off the true nature of their children's duplicity was revealed. It is unprintable what their father said. Needless to say he both embraced and threatened to strangle them. Their Mum just kept exclaiming that her hair was a mess and that she had no makeup on.

Friends who missed the party have just returned from a day trip to Lapland to visit Santa Claus with our godson. Photos show a true winter wonderland where rooms are carved from ice, drinks drunk from ice glasses, huskies mushed and reindeer pull sledges.

Full column in West Sussex Gazette, December 29