Reasons to Cheerful: It’s a Cracker! By Vicky Edwards
I recently officiated at a funeral where the deceased’s passions in life included, rather randomly, collecting Christmas cracker jokes. And I mean literally collecting them - she had a carrier bag stuffed full of slips of paper, each one carefully retrieved from Christmas tables across the years. I’m not sure that it was a legacy that her daughter was desperate for, but there you go.
I confess that I too have a fondness for cracker-style jokes. Christmas dinner simply isn’t complete without a mini explosion followed by the reading out of such jokes as…
What do you do if you see a spaceman? Park in it, man!
Or another favourite: What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
This level of silliness tickles me. It’s probably, in part, why I love doing panto so much - cracker jokes and panto jokes are one and the same.
It was great fun to dive headfirst into these giggle-inducers when I was writing the script for Cinderella: Panto on the Pier (we open on Christmas Eve on Bognor’s historic pier - come and join in the fun!). And while I was amazed to discover heaps of websites devoted to cracker jokes, almost as surprising was the response from friends and family when I asked about their favourites. Giving my lot a call to action usually guarantees radio silence. When it came to sharing their favourite cracker/panto joke, however, they were faster than Santa on his Christmas Eve rounds. Everyone had a pet gag that they wanted to relay.
I guess tradition plays a key part in the popularity of such jokes, but I suspect too that their sheer silliness is also appealing. As I wrote in a recent column, permission to be silly doesn’t come along all that often in adult life.
Then there is the family-friendly factor. Making them an ideal accompaniment to the festive spread for gathered clans (although one year we did inadvertently buy a ‘naughty jokes’ box of crackers, which resulted I many questions from Grandma), it's something people of all ages can join in with.
This is my final column of the year, so I wish you a very happy Christmas. May your worries be few and your hearts full. And whatever your customs and traditions, I hope you’ll find a moment to be carefree and silly.
But if that looks unlikely, book yourself into a performance of Cinderella: Panto on the Pier and I promise we’ll serve you a double helping of the delightfully daft, with cracker jokes aplenty on top.
Cinderella: Panto on the Pier runs from 24 December 2025 – 1 January 2026 at Venue 24 on Bognor Pier.
Tickets available from www.tickettailor.com/events/venue24